How NOT to handle bad breath

We’ve all been there. You across the corner to your cubical prepared to start the day’s work while you are suddenly accosted by the familiar stench of a co-worker’s bad breath.

“Here we go again…”, you think. “Another ‘H’-filled tirade that will not ever permeate my ears because I’m too busy attempting to keep it from permeating my nose.”

“So anywahhhhy,” continues your co-worker, “Hhhhank Hhhhenshhhhaaw from Hhhhuman Reshhhhourcess explained ouhhhhhr 401k plahhhhn is an outstahhhhnding invehhhhhstment optiohhhhhn…”


Somehow, we’d like to think that our forced smile and wilting eyelashes might tell the offending party that there’s something less than stellar about the way they are sounding. Unfortunately, that’s simply wishful thinking. The thing is that no one knows they have a problem. We appear to be immune to our own stench, and unlike Willy Nelson’s muse, it’s never on our minds.

So how do you tell someone that their breathe is causing you to are having issues differentiating their head from their derriere? Sure, whether it’s someone you know and are comfortable with, you can test honesty. Still, even honesty has it’s own group of problems. Do you play it off like it is a one-time occurrence you just noticed and hope that mentioning it takes care of the situation for good? Can you sit them down and also have a serious discussion which could ultimately embarrass them or cause you to look like the bad person? How will they respond to either scenario? You’d wish to be told if you had bad breath, wouldn’t you? Would you feel comfortable being told by this person who you have bad breath? Do you really know them sufficiently to be discussing this example with them?

They are all important questions whose answers will change with each unique situation. Still, there are several things you can avoid saying that are universal across all situations. I have taken the liberty of listing those hateful pounds below. Remember, honesty is the best policy, but brutal honesty is frequently unnecessary.

# 1 Gee, is your breath or did I blow my nose right after wiping my ass?

# 2 And today here’s me with the elements: Thanks, me! Well it looks like there is a stank front moving due east from wherever your mouth happens to be. We’re considering a 100% chance of Halitosis throughout the rest of your life. Sports is next followed by today�s lottery numbers. Stay Tuned!

# 3 I don’t mean to be rude however your horrible breath is melting my face. To possess to stand here and pay attention to you is agonizingly painful. Hey, you ever note that “Alien” movie where the alien is breathing in Sigourney Weaver’s face and she just cringes because the thing is indeed scary and because it’s saliva can be an acid that may eat through metal? This is a lot like that because despite the fact that your saliva won’t eat through metal, I’m fairly certain your mouth-stench will which is scaring the crap outta me, my pal. Again, https://koukuunai.zoku-sei.com/ don’t mean to be rude…

This is why, dear reader, one must choose carefully when approaching a subject this sensitive. Perhaps honesty is not always the best policy. Even better, you will want to just leave an anonymous note…and a breath mint.

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